Hey Cousin Butchie,

I have found a man who I am certain is going to be my husband for all time. I know he has told me he feels the same way, and we have shared a great deal about our lives and our families. In fact, our parents have all met, and there is no problem with any of them. I think my mother will be happy to see me get an apartment so she doesn't have to worry about cooking for me, doing my laundry, and generally "guiding" my life. My dad will miss me only because mom will have more time to nudge him. (L.O.L.).

The question is how and if I should tell my husband to be that I have been intimate with a girl a few years ago. It was part of a fraternity party gone wild. Do I tell him or keep my trap shut?

Been There

Dear Been There,

I don't see any reason you would need to mention this to your future husband. I don't know how many gay dudes have been in your situation, but I suspect there are more than a few. To me, I would have considered it drunken experimentation. The only caveat here is if you are still sexually attracted to women. In this case, it is certainly not uncommon, but it is something you must tell your boyfriend before you commit to each other. If bisexuality is part of who a dude is--he needs definitely to tell his intended life partner before a decision is made final on the marriage.

P.S. Also be sure to mention that your mother washes your clothes. That might real be the deal breaker if you expect your boyfriend to continue the practice.