Hi, Cousin Butchie,

I hope you can help me.  I am a sophomore in high school, and last April I fell madly in love with another dude in my school. He was my first in every sense and we became inseparable. I was not uncomfortable beeing seen with him all the time.  In my school, they are pretty liberal.

Anyway... I had made lots of plans in my head involving "Elmer."  We were going to go to the same college and get married and have the ideal family. We seemed to be the ideal couple, and I will have to admit that the sex with him was amazingly wonderful. I really had no one to compare him to, but I knew he was feeling the same as I was.

During the past few weeks, some friends of mine tried to tell me that he was cheating on me. I refused to believe it, but I knew that this might have explained why we didn't see each other every day like before. When I finally confronted Elmer, he didn't lie. He said that he wanted us to always be friends but that he wanted to move on and meet new guys. I cried when he told me, and I'm still crying now. It all seemed so perfect, and now it just turned into crap.  I'll never get over Elmer and I can only hope that he comes back to me sometime soon.

Please help!

Dumped Danny

Dear Danny,

The experience you have just gone through has happened to about 97% of the men and women, gay or straight in the world.  You and Elmer were attracted to each other and had a crush.  It was a little early for you to try to commit to each other.  I know how you feel , and I relly hope you can move on.  There is a possibility that Elmer will come back to you, but it's a slim one at that. 

You are going to notice in your future dating that almost every dude out there has an "ex" and the broken relationship that goes with him.  The same is true of heterosexual couples.  In the future, don't be too quick to call a hook up a relationship.  Let it go slowly until it's obvious that both of you are in sync.  Even with this assumption it could take a lot of time to find the real Mr. Right.