Our Blogs

"Theology"

 I have waited to read something on your blog which will even start to explain both Hurricane Sandy and the massacre...

Politics and Personalities take over Marriage Equality in New Jersey...WHY?

 I’ve been fighting for gay couples like me for a long time…..how long?

WORDS IN PASSING

As a transgender woman, I frequently heard from those around me, during and after my transition, that I was or wasn’t “Passing”.

Post-Op Thoughts

It has been a year and three months since my sexual reassignment surgery...

What is My Son Doing to Our Family?

I am not sure who I'm writing to, and I'm less sure why I am bothering to tell you about the problem with my son.

Overcoming Stress from Hurricane Sandy: How to Survive a Superstorm-After It's Gone!

You survived Hurricane Sandy, the Superstorm, the ‘Frankenstorm.’  So you should be feeling fine, right?

Embarrassed

I am 18 years old and I have a really hot boyfriend.  I shouldn't neglect to say that I am pretty hot myself. The problem is...

How We Stopped Being Crazy and What It Did For Gay Rights

Many LGBT people don’t fully understand the critical role that the political action against the mental health community played a in advancing lesbian and gay rights.

Why Naked Yoga?

I’ve heard it many times: I understand doing yoga, but why naked yoga?

What did I miss at the last Networking With Style?

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Networking With Style: A series of networking parties for the LGBT community in central New Jersey, held at Fiddleheads Restaurant in Jamesburg

Navigating the Path

Life is a path. Sometimes we are running down the path. We trip on bumps. Sometimes we crawl on our hands and knees.

What is Networking?

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Networking - to an IT person, this means connecting communication devices for the mutual benefit of many. The same can be said for social networking, business networking and romantic networking. It all comes down to communication.

Sad/ Almost an Orphan Revisited

You answered my message last spring and I didn't really follow what you suggested, but I want to share a success with you..

Finding Your Dream Home

You may stumble upon it at an open house, while surfing the Internet or through your friendly neighborhood real estate agent. In addition to these popular ways of landing a home, there are some less-obvious methods, such as buying foreclosed properties or attending auctions.

A Transparent Moment About the CHICKEN Issue

Many of the comments that I read on yesterday regarding that CHICKEN matter have saddened me. TRANSPARENT MOMENT: There has been a great worldwide web conversation/debate over the past few weeks about the corporate leader of a certain CHICKEN ...

Mortgage Types

Can’t get a standard mortgage, one that conforms to Fannie Mae or Freddie Mac guidelines? Not to worry. You can consider alternative types of home financing. Some of these carry higher interest rates, because the person or institution loaning you ...

How to Find a Great Real Estate Agent

Types of Agents There are different types of real estate professionals. It is important to understand the different levels of expertise. Bear in mind that licensing and certification tends to vary from state to state: Real Estate Agent- A real ...

Adding Value to Your Home

Adding Value to Your Home! Low Budget Changes There’s a fine line between adding value to your home, and dumping cash into a bottomless pit. If you don’t want to spend the money on a contractor or interior decorator, here are some low cost, ...

Tips to Finding a Gay Friendly Neighborhood

Tips to Finding a Gay Friendly Neighborhood When you and your partner are searching for your new home, you may also want to consider the type of neighborhood that you will move into. Although it’s 2012, there are still narrow-minded people out ...

Potential Roadblocks

Potential Roadblocks I thought I would share some of the roadblocks that could stand in your way while trying to buy a home. In some localities there are laws in place that prevent same sex couples from being granted the same rights that straight ...

Quick Blog!-Types of Partnerships as Recognized by Various States

Quick Blog!-Types of Partnerships as Recognized by Various States Laws pertaining to same-sex partnership vary from state to state. Some states allow gay couples to get legally married while others offer alternative options. Also, some states ...

Important Documents for Home Buying

Important Documents The paperwork will be extensive and tedious, but it is important to be aware of the documents that need to be filed when you are purchasing a new home. It is not just about the house, but also about leaving your assets to the ...

Same Sex Home Buying- Part 1

Here is my first blog! Hope you find it informative. Buying a home is a major responsibility for any couple, but same-sex couples must be especially meticulous to make sure their investment and their interests are protected. This is due in part to ...

Dating Blues

Hey, Cousin Butchie, I have been home from college for about two months, and dating has turned out to be a real bitch. I'm going into my third year at school, but this is the first summer vacation that I have been out. I have had one night flings ...

Just a test!

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I haven't posted in quite awhile, but my nephew, Cousin Butchie seems to have made up for it. I've always liked the kid, but he does come across as having all the answers! I talked to Butchie the other night and we decided to see if anyone will ...

The Future of DOMA

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What do recent court decisions that have found the federal Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) unconstitutional mean for me as a New Jersey resident in a civil union? In recent months, federal courts in California, New York and Boston have all found the ...

My First Yoga Class

I was never very athletic growing up. I hated gym class. I detested playing softball or basketball, and avoided playing them if I possibly could. In grad school when I was about 29, I thought I should do something with my body, so I took advantage ...

My Heart is Broken

Dear Cousin Butchie, My heart is broken and I need advice from you. My friends don't seem to care at all. I fell in love with the dude I loved in my junior year of high school. We made a commitment to each other, and he now tells me that he ...

Pretending Not to Notice

Pretending Not to Notice Dear Cousin Butchie, This is not an earth-shattering question, but some of my friends have become obsessed with the proper etiquette for gay men to use, and I'm asking you this one because I don't think it's been written ...

What Do I Wear for Yoga?

People often ask me what they should wear to a yoga class. Perhaps they don’t want to stand out by wearing something too unusual and different than the other yogis. Perhaps they don’t want to be the least nor the most dressed in the class. I always ...

My Sister Says.....

Dear Cousin Butchie, Last weekend, I attended my first Gay Pride Festival in Asbury Park. I was with my good friend Christopher. Actually, he is more than just a good friend. We have sex about twice a week, and he is HOT, So last weekend we ...

Mother-in-Law Problems

Dear Cousin Butchie, Roscoe and I have been in a hot and heavy long term monogamous (I think) relationship for the past two months. It is definitely serious. The only problem is Roscoe's mother who doesn't treat me well. When we go to dinner ...

Which is the GREATER Enemy? HIV or Systematic Poverty?

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Is HIV or Systemic Poverty the GREATER enemy of the Black American Community?

I Need to Turn Some Water to Wine

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My new best friends:  The View, The Chew, HGTV and Scandal!

Hello There NJ Gay Life!

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Welcome to Real Open Talk for Life with Jeffrey! I'm so excited to be a part of the blogscape at NJgaylife.com! As my blog title states...we are going to have some real and open conversations but you have to promise to be as nice as you can and ...

Justice from New Brunswick, NJ???

Posted by RJ Comments (0)
JUSTICE FROM NEW BRUNSWICK??? I waited to write anything about the trial and the sentencing of Dharun Ravi because I thought others would have more learned input. Certainly, Steven Goldstein of Garden State Equality did an excellent job of ...

The Health Insurance Conundrum

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I am planning to add my civil union partner to my employer-provided health insurance plan because my plan provides better coverage than that available through his employer. Is there anything that I should be aware of? Under the Civil Union Act, ...

Persistence is Slow Success

Early in my yoga journey I wasn’t finding much success. I was taking classes at a local gym in a dance studio filled with limber women. One day we did a pose called “Crow” and my success at it was worse than any other pose. In the pose you balance ...

Mother's Day Again!

Hey, Cousin Butchie! Well, it's Mother's Day again, and ,ya know, I have the same feelings about it. Ya know, the woman is my mother, and I, ya know, have a genuine suspicion that I am here, ya know, because my father ran out of condoms. She has ...

Heaven for Gays and Lesbians

Dear Readers, I have a few questions which came in on my KippyNJ@aol.com screen name, but I need to put them aside and reply to a letter which appeared in the "Dear Abby" column yesterday. It's a very common question, but Abby slightly missed ...

Now the Vatican is Gunning for the Sisters!

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More than likely you have read or have heard about the Vatican's attempt to pay particular attention to the religious sisters in the church. I should preface this for you with the facts about our modern day sisters. In the past, they were more ...

All They Want is Sex!

Hi, Cousin Butchie! I never thought I would be writing to an advice columnist, but I am gay and my problems are very predominant in the gay male community. They might also be exactly the same only entirely different for lesbians! Just so that ...

Sad

Dear Cousin Butchie, I am very sad most of the time, and I feel guilty about my inability to snap back since my mother passed away six months ago. I am 16 years old, and I fear how my friends might react if I told them the truth. Speaking a lot ...

Boyfriend Problem

Dear Cousin Butchie, My boyfriend is absolutely fabulous except for one thing. He is a fanatical Roman Catholic. It doesn't stop him from being a tiger in bed, but he does seem to feel guilt of some kind after the deed is done. I can't stand it. ...

Our Own Advice Column

Dear Cousin Butchie, You will probably think I am a very nasty little girl because I was snooping around in my brother's room and I found evidence that he is a big time "faggot." He actually has love letters from other guys (puke, puke). I have ...

Why Do Yoga? Focus

Why do yoga? Most people think you have to be a limber gymnast to even attempt it. Nothing could be further from the truth. Aside from any physical benefits from doing yoga, such as a more limber, healthy body and lower blood pressure, we do yoga to ...

Easter, Passover, the Titanic and the LGBT Community

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Easter, Passover, the Titanic and the LGBT Community The convergence of two of the most profound holydays for Christians and Jews occurred this past week. In the coming week, we recall the 100th anniversary of the sinking of the Titanic on her ...

New Jersey Birth Certificates May Create a False Sense of Security for Same-Sex Parents

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My civil union partner and I had a child using sperm from an anonymous donor. My partner gave birth to our son and, at the hospital, we were able to put both of our names on the birth certificate. Is it necessary for me to also adopt my son? In ...

Yoga Standing Breathing Exercise

Yoga for Men will meet tomorrow, Tuesday March 27th, at 7:30 PM at the Pride Center, 85 Raritan Ave., Highland Park, NJ. No experience necessary. Bring a mat. Wear gym clothes. Come breathe, relax, explore the possibilities of a more flexible and ...

The Bad Penny Returns

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Greetings to all of my thousands of readers who have missed my blogs lately. Your cards and messages and floral deliveries sent to the funeral home have been forwarded to me. Worry not! It was all some sort of mix-up so I can save my new suit for ...

Yoga Basics

Check out my latest two videos on yoga basics: on bending to the side while sitting. It's a great movement to do at anytime, especially while taking a break from work at your desk. And on how to sit comfortably for a yoga class, or for ...

Yoga at the Pride Center

I lead a men's yoga group at the Pride Center in Highland Park every second and fourth Tuesday from 7:30 - 9:00 PM. No yoga experience or flexibility is necessary. I started a group for men so that men, especially beginners to yoga, would have a ...

What is in a Name? Civil Unions vs. Domestic Partnerships

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If my partner and I have a registered New Jersey domestic partnership, are there any benefits to entering into a civil union or an out-of-state marriage? Yes, if you wish to have the same rights as married couples under New Jersey law. The rights ...

Please Don't Veto this Family!

Today I will begin a photo campaign to the Governor and all those in the legislature that voted against my family. I do respect other people's opinions and I hope my opinion is respected as well. I DO NOT however respect anyone voting to enshire ...

A prayer for Equality

Last night I prayed to the Gods, yes Gods, yours, mine all of them. I prayed that in the stillness of slumber love would open the hearts and minds of all those that stand against it today. It was that simple. Hoping the universe delivered the ...

OMG! The Issue is Birth Control!

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OMG! The Issue Is Birth Control. As I have written before, I am a practicing Roman Catholic. Probably, it is more accurate to say that I am a practicing Roman Catholic gay man. Since this church (fifty years since Blessed John XXIII convened ...

"Outed" at 65

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"Outing" at 65! I had really started to feel content and "in control" of my life when I came out to my family and close friends in 1979. (Now please spare me the remarks about you not having been born yet, etc.) My latest ambush on the sexual ...

Do we have to rip New Jersey apart to achieve full equality? By Jon Holden Galluccio, author of “An American Family” and a Vice Chair of Garden State Equality

Do we have to rip New Jersey apart to achieve full equality? By Jon Holden Galluccio, author of “An American Family” and a Vice Chair of Garden State Equality Back in 2007, through a wonderful job opportunity for Michael and the magic of Disney, we ...

A New Perspective from Two Twinks

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A New Perspective from Two Twinks: I want to share one of those "aha" moments I received from two Twinks who were merely seated next to me in the food court of one of our major Central Jersey shopping malls. I spotted these guys who were frankly ...

The Inevitability of Ordinary by Jon Holden Galluccio, author of “An American Family” and a Vice Chair of Garden State Equality

As a child, when I realized I was gay I was terrified. I never heard anything positive in my world being said about gay people just horrible things, horribly ugly things. A lot I heard at Our Lady Queen of Peace Church in Maywood as I sat on the ...