Despair Leads Us Nowhere

Posted by Cousin Butchie on Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Dear Cousin Butchie,

I am a sophomore in high school and I am gay.  My parents know, and they just seem to deal with it, but we never have a meaningful discussion about the subject. After the Boston Massacre of yesterday, I was in the downstairs recreation room but I heard my dad say that it's all the result of the "unbelievable sin" in the world. My mom then said that God will not tolerate sexual promiscuity (how she refers to gay people) and abortion forever. Ok, I'm gay and I'm a dude, but I cried my eyes out last night when I heard this conversation. I mean, no shit there are horrible things going on in the world, but I didn't become part of the cause because I happen to love other boys but only like girls. I hope you understand. I feel so bummed out. By the way, no one at school knows I'm gay, but I want to tell you that many heterosexual boys (and girls) were crying at various times in school today. What can I do?

Not Deaf


Dear Not Deaf,

It is truly a tragedy which hit Boston yesterday, and there have been many other horrendous events happening in the world. People always look for a scape goat when they are looking for an answer. Unfortunately, your parents find some solace in blaming LGBT people (and pro-choice advocates) for world conditions. Sorry, Not Deaf, but they are mentally and emotionally and spiritually limited people. 

Horrible tragedies have been happening for centuries, but we weren't as aware back then because there wasn't the explosion of media information avaliable which we now have. At so many times in history, people felt despair and futility and fear when looking at the evil facing their respective times. 

Let me assure you that the idea that any diety allows murder and terrorism  is just not workable. I can't tell where the world is headed, but I feel relatively sure that these are not the end times AGAIN.  How many times have Jehovah's Witnesses and various evangelists made this claim. Even in the Bible, it was clear that the writers believed that they were living in the end times.

I suggest that you concentrate on being the best gay dude you can possibly be. That's not to become compulsively a "good boy." But reaffirm always that you are a good person with much to share with the world. Don't even try to argue with your parents. At some point they will welcome a candid conversation.... or if that never happens, you will find some very good peers in the gay community who will help you realize your own goodness, lovableness and potential.  {Just a word of warning though.  There are some LGBT people who have their own issues and don't serve as role models.  You're a sensitive dude.  You'll recognize them very quickly.)

Now, rest easy and concentrate on the light and love within you.


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